From Concerns to Clarity: A Q&A Guide for Nervous Sperm Donors

Still have questions about sperm donation? We’ve got you covered.

In our last Q&A with Karen, our Andrology Service Lead, we addressed some of the most common fears and concerns men have about becoming sperm donors. But we know that donating sperm is a big decision, and there’s always more to ask. That’s why we’re back with Part 2, where we dive deeper into the process and tackle even more of your important questions.  

So if you’ve still got a few things on your mind, let’s jump in and get them answered!

1. If I donate once and decide not to continue, will that be an issue? Do you expect donors to make multiple donations over time?

Once you have been accepted as a sperm donor, it takes a huge amount of our time and financial resource to take you through the screening programme– so we would not encourage anyone to start this process without being assured you are able and willing to see it through.

2. What happens to my sperm? How long is it stored, and is there a chance it could be discarded if not used?

By law, all donated sperm samples must be frozen and held in quarantine for 6 months. At the end of a quarantine period we repeat some blood and urine tests, and once we have the negative results confirmed, we can then release the samples for use in treatment. 

You can decide how long we are allowed to store and use your samples, but on the whole donors would sign up for a minimum 10 year period. The maximum permitted is 55 years in total. Clinics do not have to store samples for the full period of consent, and may choose to discard any samples that are no longer needed for use in treatments.

3. I’ve seen that some donation banks export sperm overseas, and that makes me uneasy. Where exactly will my donation go, and how do you control that?

Exporting samples for use abroad makes us uneasy, too! We have made an absolute commitment that your samples will remain and be used in the UK, because we firmly believe that a limited number of families is in the best interests of everyone involved.

Only using your donated samples in UK clinics means you have the full protection of UK law governing gamete donation, including a maximum number of 10 donor families. 

4. I’ve heard stories about donors fathering hundreds of children. How do you make sure this doesn’t happen, and what limits are in place for the number of families my donation can help?

We understand that this recent media story is a little shocking and off-putting to men who would like to donate, but are worried about the number of children that could be born. You can read more about our views on this in our recent blog.

NUH Life is regulated by UK laws which permit a maximum of 10 families. This is strictly enforced and monitored by both our clinic, and the external regulator (the HFEA). A ‘family’ means the first child born to a recipient plus any siblings. In our experience, donors rarely have more than 15-20 individual children created across the 10 families permitted– the average is much lower than this.

Donors can also choose to restrict the number of families we can create using their samples to less than 10. However you should understand that placing severe restriction limits could mean we are unable to accept you as a donor on our programme and/or will limit the number of sample donations you can make.

5. What kind of legal responsibilities do I have after donating? Could I ever be tracked down or expected to pay child support?

UK law is very clear on this: where treatment takes place within a HFEA licensed clinic such as NUH Life, donors are not the legal parent of any children born as a result of your donation, nor do you have any financial responsibility for the donor conceived children. 

The only thing you can be held legally liable for is if you intentionally withhold important information that could lead to a child being born with inheritable conditions/disease.

6. I’m a little concerned about feeling pressured or rushed. Will I be given any sort of support or counselling during the process? I think I’d feel more comfortable if I had someone to talk to along the way.

The worst possible outcome for NUH Life is that we recruit sperm donors who will later regret their decision to join our programme. Donation is not for everyone– there are lifelong implications when you decide to help someone else have a much longed-for child. It is important to us that you have really considered what it means to be a donor, not only at this point in time, but also how you may feel in the future. Because of this, we ask all of our potential donors to see a specialist counsellor, who can help explore these things with you and ensure you feel totally comfortable before you make the decision to continue.

We don’t just offer support at the start. We are very proud that we promise to give our donors continual and lifelong support. We are a small and friendly team, and we genuinely care about the wellbeing of our donors… we can’t do our work without you! You can reach out for support from us and/or the professional counselling team at any time. We are still in touch with donors from over 20 years ago, and we encourage and foster this contact as it benefits everyone involved: the donors, recipients and children.

7. I’m worried about how sperm donation could affect my future. Will this impact my own fertility or health in any way? Could my own children or partner ever be impacted by the fact that I was a sperm donor?

Donating will not impact on your own reproductive health– some of our donors actually find being a donor reassures them about their own fertility and ability to achieve pregnancies. We do ask donors to maintain a short period of time where you don’t have any sexual activity prior to donating a sample, so you do need to consider if that is going to be acceptable to you and any sexual partners you may have. Most donors don’t find this to be a problem, it just requires a little bit of careful scheduling!

As for the future, we’re not going to lie to you– donating sperm is definitely a lifelong adventure! You are a part of creating a family, so it doesn’t stop when you hand over a sample to our staff. You are part of a bigger picture, linked to another person’s history for generations to come. We see that as a positive thing: what an amazing thing to do, a real legacy!

We know that you can’t foresee the future and how you will feel in 20 years time about something you are doing now. But through our initial contact and counselling, we will help you explore how you’d feel about contact with donor families once the children reach the age of 18… but also how your close family, friends or a partner and your own children might feel. After counselling, you may decide that donation is not the right thing for you to do, and we would fully support that decision– there is no pressure at any point to continue.

We’ve covered even more ground in this second round of questions, and we hope you’re feeling more at ease about the idea of sperm donation.

At the heart of it, sperm donation is about giving others the chance to start a family, and we’re here to make sure that you feel informed and supported throughout the entire process. It’s perfectly natural to have concerns, and we hope these answers have brought you closer to feeling ready to take that next step.  

Whether you’re still thinking it over or are ready to move forward, we’re always here to help. If you’ve got any more questions or just need a bit more reassurance, don’t hesitate to reach out. Your decision to donate could truly make a life-changing impact, and we’re with you every step of the way.